Perhaps because I am a police chaplain, I like to watch some of the police shows on television.
So, the other day I was watching "Blue Bloods" and kind of getting into what was going on. The youngest blue blood, Jimmy, had been involved in a situation where he had to shoot a man who was aiming a handgun at him with the intent to kill him.
It was a clear self-defense situation that quickly received approval from his command staff. However, two things also happened that were not exactly expected.
First, the senior blue blood, Frank Reagan (a.k.a. Tom Sellick, the Police Commissioner), was present at a news conference when a reporter began asking questions about the shooting. He wanted to know why the officer did not shoot the gun out of the aggressor's hand. (After all, the Lone Ranger could do this from more than a 100 feet away.) He then wanted to know if anyone had attempted to reason with the man.
At this point, the Commissioner Reagan interrupted to reset the situation. He suggested that instead of the man aiming his gun at some children that the reporter consider that the man was aiming at him with a loaded gun acting like he was going to shoot.
He further suggested that the average time a police officer might have in making up his mind was about one second. To this, the reporter started to suggest something else, but the commissioner interrupted by saying, "I'm sorry, that's irrelevant; you're already dead!"
Unfortunately, that's true.
Many of the actions a police officer takes involves some very quick thinking, and if the decision is not the right one, there are severe consequences.
That's why the Police Academy teaches all police cadets to (1) always keep their guns loaded and ready to fire, and (2) always to shoot to kill if they are confronted with deadly force. The public does not always understand this, but it is a matter of life and death for the officer.
It's like the person who keeps a gun at home for protection, but locks the shells up somewhere to make sure no one gets hold of them. Just how can that person use his gun for protection under those circumstances? Gun safety is vitally important, but it involves more than just keeping a weapon in a safe place; it also involves knowing how to utilize the weapon under a variety of situations.
Second, the officer involved in the shooting went through some severe emotional feelings that he never dreamed would happen. His sister-in-law, a nurse working in the emergency room, tried to tell him about what he might experience, but he just ignored her.
Suddenly, he had feelings of guilt, second-guessing what had occurred, re-enacting what had happened and attempting to find some way to reconnect with his life before the unfortunate event. He went to see the man's widow (a very bad idea), only to be angrily rejected when she informed him that he was really there to help himself and not her and the family.
Then, when it became known that the man actually had committed "suicide by cop" (a situation where someone decides to commit suicide by threatening a police officer with deadly force in order to force the officer to kill him), he became very angry.
It took him a long time to accept what had happened and to move on with his life. Notice, that I did not say he got over it, for there are many things that people do not get over, and that is one of them. You just learn how to live with it.
Over the years, I have been involved with officers who have encountered situations that tear their emotions apart. Although they want to be known as tough, able to deal with anything, if truth be known, they would have to admit that these situations do not go away quickly.
Some of the symptoms are like PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder), but they usually are not that severe -- but they are there. I know because I also have been exposed to some of the same situations, and being a chaplain did not help all that much.
So, to whom do we go for help. Well, in my case, I usually go to the Lord. He is a great listener, and provides a lot of comfort as well.
For police officers, the answer is not always that simple. It usually is not possible to go to one's spouse, for they do not understand. Sometimes they may go to a chaplain, a counselor or another officer. And sometimes they just suffer alone, hoping that it will soon go away.
It doesn't, but they do learn how to live with it. All of life's complicated, and the life of our police officers is no exception.
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Box is the chaplain for the Bella Vista police and fire departments. The opinions expressed in this column don't necessarily reflect the views of the newspaper.
Editorial on 04/09/2014